There are a few reasons why a relationship can fizzle out, or fade away. And sometimes we can get ahead of ourselves, or just play it too cold. Everyone male and female need to ease into what feels comfortable, enjoyable, and worth their time & effort. Therefore, if there are any red flags, or any strong behaviours, and undesirable behaviours. You might not see them again!
People have a lot of options these days. It’s sad, but it’s true. And there are no qualms of doing right by you. Many people seem to be quite selfish now. But they are still lonely, together or apart (often). Building trust, empathy, emotional trust, sociable, and popular things help. This creates oxytocin, and will help the relationship. Sharing, doing, laughing. Just going with the flow, and having fun.
Are you flexible and easy going? Or, do you have a lot of problems, or a strong attitude that makes things difficult for your partner? Both men & women can dig their heels in, and be stubborn. Are there be huge problems, and hurdles to overcome? This is such a huge turn off for both men and women. Also annoying habits can be a turn off. Everything could be right, except… And it might be one thing.
The way you manage your life, and carry yourself is what really counts in relationships. How you speak, pay attention, and how you reply, and give feedback, or show you’re actively listening. The way you treat your other half, understand them, and not just take them for granted. And the way that you guide them on how to treat you. This is something that’s overlooked. Show the other half exactly what you like, and praise them. Appreciation, and encouragement are what’s needed. And a bit of real honesty, and intimacy. It can’t be forced. It must be genuine.
You may both share a dream, and it may be that even though there is love, there are just too many differences between you. The differences could be lifestyle, culture, friends, work, age, or habits. And these have to be handled properly and maturely. Recognise the differences, and if you care about yourself and the girlfriend, or boyfriend, let them be themselves as well.
People can stop making an effort, taking the other half for granted, being unfair, or abusing the trust. Honesty, kindness, respect, caring, and too much familiarity can be boring, or even a nightmare. Some people are not who they say they are, or pretend to be. Many people fake it to be in a relationship. Later on down the line, the cracks begin to show. Men are often good at hiding and disguising their true nature. Worried they won’t be accepted. Or having issues about their sexuality, mentality, and careers. Testosterone when not balanced with oxytocin, or not getting enough happy feelings dopamine, they will struggle with not feeling enough. Women have to learn about mens hormones. And men like to be needed, appreciated, and desired. Thats about all they really desire. When a female (or male) looks up to them, respects them, and trusts them, and understands, this is how the relationship lasts.
Women cheat if they are missing out on the love and attention through inconsistency (male cheating), or, sometimes it can be hormonal, and chemical. Women can have their heart for one man, but their bodies may want someone else, even if they don’t know it yet. Sometimes the man can be insensitive, or boring in the bedroom. Women need excitement and fun too.
Ladies enjoy exploring with partners. But sometimes less is more. When there is high pressure to perform, or they do not reach their climax, over time they will feel unhappy, frustrated, even if everything else is going right. Guys should find out what women like, not just what they want. And never presume. Women have a wild side too. Discussing sex more, but not in a crude way. Girls love to talk about sex actually. They think about sex less than men. But they probably think more deeply about it!
Things like nagging, dominant behaviour, emotional outbursts, tantrums, cheating, and communication problems are the first sign of what’s to come down the line. Your partner has two options. They can run for the hills and take cover. Or, they can care and try to work things out, and support you. But don’t abuse the kindness in your relationship. There is a limit to what your partner will tolerate long term.
Inexperience can make people behave out of passion, or lust, or turn the other cheek, or wear rose-tinted glasses. People who are a soft touch are not considered suitable partners. People must have a backbone, and respect themselves in order to attract a suitable long term partner. Don’t show your weakness or vulnerability too early (if at all). Have some pride and self respect.
We may seek to control out of fear of losing someone. But ultimately drive them away into the arms of someone else. The same thing happens when we play hard to get. Or when we fail to be there when needed. Forgetting anniversaries, special occasions, dates, and arrangements, are a big no no.
Not fitting the script when with family & friends. You must be as regular as possible when you are with family and friends, and you want to impress them. Be yourself, be confident, and just be you. Make a home in you, and something your partner can rely on. Not just the other way around. Show their friends and family love too.
Repeated behaviours, incompatible habits, lifestyle choices can make things quite difficult to carry on. Sex is another topic. For men, there must be plenty of attraction, excitement, and perks. For women, excitement, consistency, honesty, and commitment are all important. It can’t be all encompassing. Both partners should be comfortable, happy, and feel secure, appreciated, and cared about.
Many people crave to be in a relationship, and not have a succession of one night stands. Though many play it cool. Everyone is looking for the one. But they may have one or two things going on. It can be lonely figuring stuff out, getting rejected, or wasting your time on the wrong type. But we attract what we feel. You should be able to recognise how you feel, and your base emotion. Are you balanced? Are you strong, can you be there for someone else?
People have huge expectations and ideals. This is from the way they were raised, their peers, culture, and belief system. So, if they let you know what they can deal with, and what they can’t, take their word for it. Listen carefully to the love language.
If you’re not great at communicating well, or lack people skills, then why not practice those skills. And at the same time, consider therapy. If you do have emotional baggage, or insecurities, it will sour a good relationship. Sometimes people need a bit of coaching, mentoring, or a friendly ear, so they can feel sure about what’s. really going on. An honest opinion helps. We tend not to listen to our friends and family. So get a second opinion, and talk to your partner. But less talking, and just feel the moment. Noticing things, relaxing, and doing other things, this will keep the interest going, and developing yourself, learning, growing.
Know how to put yourself first, your family second, and your partner a top three. You can’t put everything into something, that may end anytime. Making the partner number one, or putting them on a pedastool isn’t the way to stay happy in any relationship.
ALWAYS put yourself first, in terms of healthy you. Then you can decide if this relationship is actually right for you.
